The Problem Is Clear

Words are important and so are their meanings. Using them to empathize with your customer will increase sales. Telling your customer all the reasons that you’re awesome makes you average. Average because it’s the norm. 

They must trust you and your answers before buying. The key to earning trust in the beginning are your words. Words that clarify their problem. 

People buy when they feel understood. If you can articulate the problem better than the customer they will almost automatically trust you have the answer.

We Care

When I hear “I don't care what people think” I get a little jittery because it’s hard to believe. 

Caring is important, but can be painful. The danger comes when the action is motivated by what people think. It has a way of cheapening the outcome. 

If you’re doing it for show, most people will know. 

Doing what is right or loving never requires you to wonder what people think. It allows you to be careless. It’s where freedom lives. 

That's a BAD Idea Craig!

When we feel challenged or questioned, the natural response is defensiveness. If our idea or position seems threatened, we protect. Standing up for yourself is a useful skill. The problem comes when we take the question personally. 

Separating the question or partitioning the challenge from yourself is hard work. It’s hard work because it feels, at first glance, to be personal.

“That’s a bad idea, Craig” 

Less mature ears may hear… 

“You’re bad Craig and you don’t know what you’re doing.” 

If you have pre-existing tapes playing in your head and you allow a challenge to validate the tapes you’ll end up in your lizard brain. The idea or position was challenged, not the personhood. 

If you’re easily offended it will cost you money and cause you pain.

Principle Paradox

Humans will always let each other down. Assuming malice can make it even more painful. 

If someone you look up to lets you down, it gets complicated. 

Separating good ideas from the human that falls short takes some maturity. Waiting for the perfect human to learn from will stunt your growth. 

You know the truth when you see it. You know a durable principle when you hear it, no matter the source. 

If you pay attention you’ll see, all leaders are hypocrites doing the best they can… including you.

Wolf Proof

Building important things or solving worthy problems requires good, raw materials. Sourcing good materials makes the project sturdy.

If you don’t, the wolf will huff and puff and you’ll have to start over.

Pull raw materials from people you trust. Input and an open stance is vital. Vital because we don’t know what we don’t know. 

Thinking you know it all will make you an easy target for the wolf.

Good Grief

When something bad happens, our instinct is to “move on”. Moving on can distance us from the pain. 

But doesn’t time heal all wounds? Yes, but only when you’ve acknowledged and properly grieved the loss. 

Moving on without grieving will bite you. Moving on too quickly doesn’t show respect for the loss. If you skip this step the pain won’t dissolve. It ends up staying in your body. It typically burps out in unexpected ways. Like mean words, blocked creativity, or illness. 

Grieving the loss of things you can't keep will free your mind to do what only you can.

Perpetual Fear

When we are afraid of something, we tend to put it off. 

Putting it off comforts us because it “might be” less scary later. So the fear grows and torments our mind. It rarely goes away but instead expands. 

Side stepping, deferring, or wishing it away validates the fear in our minds and makes it more scary. 

The brave and successful thing to do is take action...because action is the best cure.

Job +

Last year I had a business meeting at a restaurant. Table of seven on a busy day. The server did her job. Explained the menu, filled our glasses, and delivered the food. 

It’s what’s expected. There are a million places to eat. 

Why did I choose this one? Trust. 

I knew I could trust them to think. Think about not just the table and the food, but think about when and how. The server knew when to help and how to give us space. Thinking in the service industry is rare. 

When you find a thinker, give them your business.

Money Buys Happiness

It buys happiness everyday for people who are already happy. Money can buy sadness and pain too. It speeds up and enhances. It amplifies who you already are. It buys options. Options are tricky because there are happy ones and sad ones. There are wise ones and foolish ones. 

Wanting more money isn’t bad, you just need to understand the options and the consequences. If you have a wandering eye, hiding a mistress becomes an option. Giving more money to your church becomes an option. Taking a cool vacation becomes an option. 

Money CAN buy happiness, it just can’t create it.

Inspiration Is For Chumps

Inspiration is elusive.

So we wait, we wait because it feels good to be inspired. 

Things come easily. Time stands still and creativity flows. It feels euphoric and seemingly comes out of nowhere. It's worth remembering how you were last inspired. 

The next time you get into the zone, rewind a bit. Chances are you weren't “waiting” for creativity to come your way. Action is the lead domino to inspiration. Waiting to be inspired is mostly an excuse. 

Get to work and you will notice inspiration weave its way into your next creation.

Warehouse

It turns out our brains make pretty poor warehouses for ideas. 

Creating a proper receptacle for our ideas relieves the brain to move on to new ideas. New ideas are useful, especially when paired with your old ones. 

Creative brilliance is usually achieved by the pairing. Pairing is easier when they are pulled out of your brain and put on a whiteboard. 

Our brains are designed to have ideas not hold them.

A Tip For The Boys

Women want to be validated...

The question is, how do you validate something that seems ridiculous in your eyes?

If she has a deep concern that seems to be an illogical waste of emotion, how do you possibly agree? Agreeing in your eyes means you have to lie to yourself. Deny the truth. Deny logic. Deny the facts. (From your POV) 

We don’t want her to be in pain. We want to help her, but agreeing with her seems loco… 

Here's my pro tip boys: You don’t need to agree. They want validation not agreement. Validation says, “I hear you, I understand” and “that must be really hard.” Validation addresses her feelings around the topic. 

Set aside the topic (even if it’s about you) and validate. 

Defending yourself is lazy and will set you back… I checked.

Brick-Pack

Everyone walks around with a backpack full of bricks…

Bricks that are heavy, but not too heavy. Our backpacks have a brick limit and ideal capacity. 

Sometimes a friend has too many bricks that won't fit in their perfectly sized pack. Since the bricks won't fit, we step in to carry the burden for a bit. It's what we do as friends. 

Friends will also try to hand you bricks that belong in their pack. They know you'll take them because you're a helper. You’re strong… but maybe you’re weak. Weak because you can’t tell them no. 

Helpers say yes, helpers also forget the weight they’re already carrying. 

Eventually, the helper resents. 

The wise helper says NO to the bricks that aren’t theirs. That way they can carry bricks when others can't.

Fireman

Consider removing all decisions out of the first hour of your day. 

Most of us get fatigued throughout the day. We’re faced with so many options… (Starbucks has 80,000 drinks combinations.)

Positive, quiet, tech-free routines that don’t require a response will preserve your mind. Jumping right into a jungle of choices feels productive. Productive because you’ve put a dent in your inbox, you’ve caught up on the news, you’ve scrolled the feed. 

Neuroscience proves the cost is high... Clarity and productivity are far from reactionary. 

Running from fire to fire is for firemen. The world needs firemen, and chances are you're not one.

The Big Mo

Losing momentum can be unsettling. Without it, the excitement leaks, attitudes wobble, and fears surface. 

Will I ever get it again? Is the ride over? Do I have what it takes to get it back on track? Why do I feel like I’m always climbing?

Imagine a poorly designed roller coaster... You click-clack to the top, chop down, then back to a climb again. But wait… where’s the flow? Where are those fun banking turns that build speed? Climbs are no fun unless there is a payoff. 

Step back and look at your roller coaster from the highway. Does it look right? When you bomb a steep section is there a pay off? 

Solid hustle will get you momentum, but it will take good design to keep it.

Salesy

Most of us don't like being convinced. 

Convincing is salesy. Salesy because the motive is the sale. 

Persuasion is guiding someone down a path they like. A path that makes their life better. Persuasion is an art. It requires attainment, empathy, and story. 

It’s worth paying attention when you are being persuaded. You feel like they’re on your side, like they understand. You might not even remember what they said but you do remember how they made you feel. 

Selling is noble. Convincing is not.

Hybrid

The world is full of tradeoffs...

Tradeoffs frustrate us because we can’t have it all. 

In cycling there are tons of trade offs. One bike doesn't do it all. You’d better get ready to break something if you want to take your 14lb carbon race bike on a mountain bike trail. The hybrid bike on the other hand, CAN do it all. You can take it on the road, cruise the gravel, and bump through the trails.

The problem is, it’s stuck in the average. It’s not fast on the road, and you really can’t rip it on the local trail. “Average” eliminates trade offs. 

Building something that does it all forces it into the hybrid category. The hybrid category can only be average. Choosing “average” is safe. 

Trade offs require commitment, and commitment requires a decision. A decision to avoid average can separate the good from the great...

CNN

We all have our own zone of genius...

If we want to make our mark we must maximize our time in this zone. The demands of reality pull us into areas that are outside our wheelhouse. When our genius is neutralized, our input becomes average.

The key element to staying in the zone is: Delegation.

It’s a tricky motion because it requires trust and clarity. It requires letting go and some training. 

When I find myself spending too much time outside the zone, I start my CNN (Craig Not Needed) list. These are items I need to off-load to someone with more talent.

It’s worth finding your own zone so you’re not slowing your impact. 

Pair your own “__NN” list with the geniuses around you. 

They will be eager to make their mark.

True Value

The value of a product is what it's actually worth, without emotion or expectation from the outside. 

High profit margins are never made at this level; the profit is nested in the intrinsic value. 

It’s worth noting that intrinsic value is in the eye of the beholder. This is why the psychology of selling is important.

Persuading the buyer that your product is worth more than the money in their hand is a great way to make the world a better place. The good news is there’s a million dollar idea in all of us. 

Start testing your ideas until you find it. If it truly improves lives, wealth is nearby. 

Go make your mark!

Gravitational Pull

Personal growth is an argument. It disagrees with how things have always been. A new idea, a new lens to see a new angle, or a disruptive set of actions. Our normal patterns of “being” are comfortable. If it’s working, why try to improve, why be open to a better way? 

If your current default settings are producing reasonable results, staying put becomes reasonable. If you find yourself in discomfort, consider these two reasons:

1. The default isn’t reasonable anymore and it hurts

2. You’re in the middle of getting a new default 

Sometimes circumstances force us into growth mode. Sometimes the pain of your current settings outweigh the pain of growth. 

Our default has a gravitational bias towards comfort. A baby step towards growth is finding a tribe that normalizes the discomfort, and is always growing.